Saturday, November 19, 2005

CLASSIFIED: Minutes of 6/10/03 National Security Council Meeting

At great risk to my own freedom (as well as the freedom of the source who provided me these materials), I am posting a transcript of the National Security Council (NSC) meeting from June 10, 2003.

In the meeting, the particpants discuss exposing Valerie Plame's name to various media sources. Included in the meeting:

  • George Bush

  • Dick Cheney

  • Donald Rumsfeld

  • Condoleeza Rice

  • Stephen Hadley

  • Karl Rove

If I stop posting for more than a day, you will know that I have been hauled in for questioning. If I cease posting for more than a week, you will know that I've been dragged down to Guantanamo. And if I never post here again, you will know that I was renditioned to Uzbekistan where I had my sense of humor forcibly removed using only a set of needlenose pliers and a curling iron.

Read on for the full transcript...

CLASSIFIED: Transcript of 6/10/03 National Security Council meeting

HADLEY: So who gets to tell old Banlon Bob about Wilson's covert old lady?

CHENEY: (unintelligible)


RICE: No, I won't take him to dinner and seduce him, Dick.

CHENEY: (unintelligible)

HADLEY: Why you? I would LOVE to tell him!

CHENEY: (unintelligible)

ROVE: Agreed, the bastard will do anything to get an exclusive for his next book, but you're the Vice President and we have to keep you in the clear. And, besides, the way you mumble, he might think her name is 'Flame' and not 'Plame'.


CHENEY: (unintelligible)


HADLEY: Dick, you kill me!

CHENEY: (unintelligible)

BUSH: Yeah! Torture, not kill, Steve! Heh-heh-heh-heh-heh--

ROVE: Cut that stupid cackle, George. You sound like a little girl when you do that.

BUSH: Oh... Sorry, everyone.

RUMSFELD: I would do it, but Woodward is such a suck ass, I'm likely to--

LIBBY: Don, in all honesty, you're not talking to anybody anymore. Go back to the Pentagon and stay in your office like Karl told you to.

RUMSFELD: Fuck you, Scooter.

CHENEY: (unintelligible)

RUMSFELD: Maybe I am, Dick, but I'm still smarter than numbnuts over there.

BUSH: Are you pointing at me?

ROVE: Shut up, George.

BUSH: I want Andy to call my mom... Right now!

RICE: Now, calm down George. Please, Don, stop with the 'numbnuts' talk.

HADLEY: Look, I'm telling Woodward. Okay?

CHENEY: (unintelligible)

HADLEY: I have his number on speed dial, Dick. And I'm still faster than you!


CHENEY: (unintelligible)


LIBBY: Okay, but I get to tell Judy Miller.

HADLEY: Oh, look at him jump on that!


RUMSFELD: You mean literally?

HADLEY: Why not? Everyone else has!


RUMSFELD: Scooter thinks Judy's hot.

CHENEY: (unintelligible)


BUSH: Yeah, Condi is way hotter, especially when she wears her spike heel black boots and her--

ROVE: George... Inappropriate. Again.


RICE: You guys act like you're in your high school lockerroom.

HADLEY: Hey, you should be flattered. We think you're way hotter than Judy Miller!

RICE: I wish you'd st--

CHENEY: (unintelligible)


LIBBY: It IS hard to tell when colored people are blushing, Dick!


HADLEY: Okay, I got Woodward, Scooter's got Miller.

ROVE: I'll do my part and make a few calls.

BUSH: Should I call any--

ROVE: Shut up.

BUSH: But--

ROVE: Shut up.


ROVE: Shut up.

CHENEY: (unintelligible)


RICE: Yes, yes, Dick we'll 'gut that fucker, Wilson.' Good job, everyone. Meeting adjourned!



At 11/21/2005 11:57 PM, Anonymous SeattleLiberal said...


(unintelligible) ever. I thought this (unintelligible),(unintelligible).

Ha Ha

(unintelligible) for now,



At 11/30/2005 12:22 AM, Blogger Bob Johnson said...

There used to be a cartoon character who just mumbled (though I can't recall which character -- I think it was a dog). Everytime I see Cheney speak, I'm reminded of that character.


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